


You Taught Me the Courage of Stars

by dawnofthedusk



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: DameRey, Established Relationship, F/M, Future Fic, PRSummerExchange, damereyevents, prsummerexchange17
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2018-11-19 01:36:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11303046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dawnofthedusk/pseuds/dawnofthedusk
Summary: Poe goes on a mission and Rey gets distracted until he’s back.





	You Taught Me the Courage of Stars

Rey grinds her teeth and curls her fingers into the dirt. The smell of the damp earth surrounds her and somewhere in the back of her mind she knows it's comforting, but she can't think about _why_ right now. There's a pounding in her head; the sounds of the trees in rustling in the wind, the lake nearby lapping against the pebbled shore, Luke's quiet breathing as he watches her from a few feet away. She can feel the cold seep into the material at her knees, eyes closed she can visualise the stones in front of her, reaches out with phantom hands to move them and hold them in place.

 _Almost there_.

Rey's lips pull back into a snarl as she pushes, pushes. The sound of an X-Wing soaring over head breaks her concentration and she releases a gasp, the stones she was stacking tumbling onto the ground.

"Stop." Luke's quiet voice makes her open her eyes.

"I almost had it." Rey sighs.

"No. You're pushing too hard, it needs to come naturally." Luke explains. "You got distracted."

Rey huffs out a frustrated breath through her nose.

"Let's leave it for today."

She takes a few deep breaths for good measure just to calm herself.

"Don't be so hard on yourself, you're doing well." Luke waits for her on the edge of the clearing so they can head back to the base together. Rey climbs to her feet, wiping her dirty hands on her rough spun trousers.

"Distractions are inevitable." Luke continues. "Strong emotions will pull your focus."

Rey frowns as they wind their way through the trees.

"It wasn't his ship." Luke says, causing Rey to stop.

"What?"

Luke turns to her. "Poe Dameron. It wasn't his X-Wing."

Rey swallows, her mouth suddenly dry, tries to say "I don't..."

"I felt your concern." Luke interupts. "The Jedi are gone, Rey. Their rules with them."

Luke continues walking. Rey waits a few beats before following behind him.

"It scares me." Rey admits, her voice quiet. It's not just what she feels for Poe that scares her. It's Finn and Chewie and Leia. Luke, himself. It's what she felt for Han. It's the fear of losing someone who is important to her again.

"Being attached to someone _is_ fear, Rey. You worry about losing them, about something or someone hurting them." Luke's voice grows strained. "The Jedi of old saw this as a weakness. The fear of loss can be manipulated into something else until it eats you alive."

"How can you fight through it?" Rey asks.

"You don't." Luke sighs. "You just live with it. The fear will always be there but you can't let it stop you from letting people in. It's acceptance you have to learn. To let things...people...go."

They've reached the entrance of the base now and Luke bids her goodnight before heading inside. Rey takes a breath, closing her eyes a moment before making her way towards her own quarters.

* * *

Rey lies awake in her bunk for hours. She thinks of Starkiller Base, the way she felt the Force vibrating through her veins, called a lightsaber to her hand without even trying to, held her own against a force trained enemy.

Now she struggled to move rocks.

Luke had tried to explain that adrenaline was a factor. She had used the Force under duress and now she was thinking too much about it.

And Poe.

He had been due back days ago from a reconnaissance mission. There had been nothing but static when they had tried to hail him. It wasn't entirely unusual for communications to go down with pilots when they were off planet and further out than usual, nor was it unusual for any of the pilots to miss their scheduled return - unforeseen circumstances arose. It's not _unusual_ , Rey reminds herself. But still, she can't seem to shake the sickly feeling in her stomach that something is amiss.

With a huff, Rey throws back the blanket and swings her legs out of bed, groping in the dark to pull on her boots. She grabs her belt (lightsaber attached) and fastens it about her waist, heading for the door.

* * *

She doesn't know where she's going, just _out_. She needs to see the sky.

Finding herself in the clearing again, Rey blinks down at the stones still in the dirt where they had fallen earlier.

She sits cross legged in front of the pile, extending her hands in front of her. She takes a deep breath and focuses her energy. The smallest of the stones begins to rise fluidly and lands with a gentle tap atop the stone adjacent to it. Rey allows herself a small smile of triumph.

Not breaking concentration, Rey rolls her shoulders and raises another stone to balance on the previous two. She holds them in position for several heartbeats.

The only sound is her own harsh breathing in her ears. The cold makes her shiver. And then there's that feeling. That sickly feeling coiling in the pit of her stomach, something akin to dread, that has been there since Poe slid out of bed six days ago at first light to set off.

Something breaks atmosphere. With a gasp Rey wheels around to search the sky, stones falling forgotten into a heap again. She sees it, the outline of a ship against the inky black sky, lit by the twin moons on this planet. At once she knows it's him.

Rey clambers to her feet and makes a dash for the base, hopping over roots and ducking to avoid branches. In her haste a branch catches on her cheek and cuts a shallow gash. She hardly notices as she she darts through the woods. The ship is coming in to land, smoke trailing from one engine. If she had stopped to observe she would have seen its approach was off, that it would land too hard (not dangerously so but harder than it should). But the smoke tells her all she needs to know - the ship is damaged and it's going to crash.

The smoking ship reaches the duracrete runway before she does. Fire crews surround it, attempting to quell the small blaze before it engulfs the ship. On call mechanics swarm from the hangar, it's still the middle of the night so there aren't as many as there would have been but there are enough. It's not his X Wing but she knows it's him. She can _feel_ him.

The medical crew gets him out, through the crowd of people she can't see much of him.

"Poe!" Rey yells but the press of people around him is too close. She shoves and shoves until she breaks through and she sees him and Force, there's so much blood. He looks barely conscious and Rey's stomach drops.

 _But he's here. He came home. He's alive._ She tells herself. Chants it in her head. Over and over as she follows them to the med centre.

* * *

He's sedated and he looks peaceful in his sleep. His left arm is broken and badly burned, there's a slash above his left eye and his lip is split. They tell her he has two broken ribs. _But he is alive._

Rey sits by his bed in the med centre, watching him sleep with wide and fearful eyes. She reaches out with her mind but whatever they have given him has quieted his mind and there's nothing but the hazy glow of sleep.

"I should have been with you." Rey says quietly, speaking as if he were awake and could hear her. "I knew you shouldn't have gone alone." She reaches out and brushes her hand across his forehead, pushing his curls back. There's no hint of a fever which she's glad of.

She has been sitting by his side for hours. Finn had brought her some food just after dawn, before he headed to a briefing but it had gone untouched, he told her he would be back later to check on her and Poe. Leia had come, and Luke. But everyone has somewhere to be and Rey is sure she does too. Training, probably. But she won't leave his side. Not until he wakes.

Luke had told her fear was part of caring for someone, but there was anger in her too. Anger that she hadn't been there to help him, anger at those responsible for doing this, anger that she had _known_ something was wrong but had let him go without saying anything.

Rey takes his good hand between hers, leans forward to press it to her cheek. She can feel him in there, the physical contact making it stronger. It's not so much a presence as a feeling; the calm and quiet of Poe. It was a rare side to him. He could be rash and passionate and determined. But there were quieter moments. Moments when they were wrapped up together, she'd feel the calm roll off of him in waves, washing over her in turn. Rey closes her eyes, tries to let that feeling cocoon her now.

She feels his fingers flex (just barely) and her head shoots up. Poe's eyes open slowly, blinking, trying to adjust to the light. They swivel frantically until the come to rest on her and he breathes out a sigh of relief.

"Rey…" He whispers her name like she's the answer to a prayer and tears come to her eyes as she smiles.

"Rey." He repeats her name as she brings her face up to his and kisses him gently, mindful of his split lip.

"It's good to see you." He croaks, throat dry from lack of use.

"What happened?" Rey whispers, smoothing her hand across his forehead.

"Later." Poe closes his eyes and winces when he shifts position.

Rey nods and kisses him again. She still holds his hand in one of hers and he brushes his thumb over her knuckles.

"I shouldn't have let you go." Rey shakes her head.

"Let me?" Poe squeezes his eyes shut as he tries to laugh but is hit with pain. "Since when do we let each other do things?"

Rey huffs at him.

"I should have been with you." She amends.

"You couldn't have known."

"I did...I knew something was wrong...I-I felt it." Rey hesitates. She usually tries to avoid talking about that side of things with Poe. She knew some people did not care for the Force, particularly if they had been on the receiving end of an assault like Poe (and herself) had been with Kylo Ren. She and Poe never discuss it; not after that first night when she had spilled her soul to him and he had done the same. She wishes they were back there now, pressed up tight together in an effort to keep warm in their little drop ship, nothing to do on an ice covered planet while the waited for rescue except talk and talk.

"Rey…" his tone makes her look up to meet his eyes. "You couldn't have known."

"Do you remember that night on Ando Prime?" Rey asks, thoughts still on that night in the snow.

"Of course." Poe nods. "It was the first night I knew I wanted to spend every night with you."

He hadn't meant like _that_ , she knows. That hadn't come until much later. But her face colours all the same and he strokes his thumb across her hand again.

"You'd never seen snow before." Poe shifts again, turning his head to look at her better. "And you loved it until you stepped outside that drop ship."

It was true. They had gone to the planet to see if anyone amongst the pod racers could be recruited. Rey had buzzed with excitement at the prospect of a new environment. She had never seen real snow before (she doesn't count Starkiller Base) and the concept of an entire planet covered in it had fascinated her. But there had been a mechanical fault during landing and they were stuck there until a rescue ship could be sent. What had been beautiful at first was hellish by the time word came back that help was on the way. The cold crept into her bones and she had shuddered in spite of the many layers she wore in preparation. She shivers now at the memory and Poe watches her with a smile on his face.

"Why are we talking about Ando Prime?" He asks. She remembers her initial thought process that brought her to that particular destination.

"Next time...I want to come with you." Rey stares at him with determination in her eyes. "I don't care if you or the General think it's unnecessary. I can use the Force for a reason. I won't ignore it when I know something isn't right."

He doesn't argue, simply nods.

"You should rest more." Rey tells him. "I'll be here when you wake up."

And she will be.

She loves him and she will not see him alone again.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my fic for the Damerey Summer Exchange for jjfantasy!
> 
> The prompt I went with was 'distracted Rey on Jedi training, cannot focus because of Poe'. I tried it a few ways and it seemed to just flow better when I wrote from an established relationship point of view, I hope that's okay! I really hope you like this (I'm super nervous about posting since I've never published any SW fic before) - I tried a bunch of different endings but none of them seemed to fit right and now I'm worried it's too abrupt.


End file.
